Erase negative attitude

Jealousy

Envy. Resentment. Bitterness. Synonymous to the evil all-consuming jealousy. And we have all fallen victim of this fundamental human feeling. Why so important? Because jealousy is a motivator. It is drive and pushes people to act, either in spite or imitation, and for good or bad.

No person can confidently and honestly say that they have never felt jealous of another. Well no person in modern society that is.

I accept that I have felt major waves of jealousy, or certain annoying tinges. But this afternoon, as I was updated of news of various events from friends, I found myself pondering over why I wasn’t jealous. I mean people I really adored, or wanted to hang out with, were gushing about some other similar candidate to me, and I was completely happy for her. And it does not help that there has been competition between me and the girl, but I did not once resent the fact that she had assumed my role in whatever broken friend group there had been.

 I guess I have matured. Or I have no time, no heart, and no energy to envy someone over something so superfluous. A relationship with popular, sociable people.

Had it been me a few  years back, I would have probably been driven to compensate for whatever the girl had done to make my ‘friends’ like her immediately.

That feeling that I had overcome jealousy was very reassuring.

But it is not always that someone is so strong to not curse another’s fortunes. I mean, at school for instance. Sure there are average achieving students, some of varied abilities and talents. But if you strive to achieve the best, then the drive is inspiration, support and goals. But eventually, other people come in the way. Students get praised for participation in a competition that immediately makes the teacher fonder of them. And you feel almost defeated. Almost. ‘That lucky bastard. Damn them. OK well, let’s try harder at the upcoming test. Let’s BEAT them’, you tell yourself.

You have just turned a person’s achievement into a cursed event. That student could have been working night and day on that project, for weeks even, and as they get the praise they deserve, the only thing that goes through your mind is ‘I can do even better’.

That is not healthy. That may be, when it happens minimally, but when you see everybody as competition, you lose. You are defeated.

In the future, you will view a friend as an opponent. Your own family or siblings as obstacles. Your love life could be placed in havoc. And believe me, these scenarios do happen very often, and have very severe consequences.

So what do you do? You have to learn to turn away. Focus on how happy the person must be. Be selfless for once. Just open your eyes and realize that you aren’t the only one dreaming, planning and acting. Everybody is. You just have to learn to accept it, live with it, support it and remain confident in your own ability.

Don’t let it consume you. Seriously don’t.

System Restart

Hi,

20 days into 2014 and I think it is fair to say that I have abandoned my resolutions COMPLETELY.
I shall backtrack slightly: the first three days were totally cool and I earnestly stuck to my goals. But then in the holidays, with very strong influential persuasive friends, you kinda let yourself think "Ok, PB is healthy so it's totally fine to eat heaps of PB cookies". That situation struck me mercilessly.

Then a week later, after intense "un-resolutionary actions" on my behalf, I wanted to get back on track, but again, a few days later, with the heat wave hitting Melbourne, I succumbed to my laziness and unhealthy habits. 

I have come to realize that I shouldn't really beat myself over the head about this stuff, because it can be fixed. What's done is done. No point in crying over spilt milk. Sort of like this metaphor:

"A psychologist walked around a room while teaching stress management to an audience. As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they'd be asked the "half empty or half full" question. Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired: "How heavy is this glass of water?" Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. to 20 oz. She replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute, it's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my arm. If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn't change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes." She continued, "The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water. Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt. And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything." It’s important to remember to let go of your stresses. As early in the evening as you can, put all your burdens down. Don't carry them through the evening and into the night. Remember to put the glass down!"

I realize that everything I am doing goes against the nature of the person I aspire to be. Rather than building a strong, healthy body fueled with goodness, I am drowning in pizza, fried nothings and cookies. Rather than carrying on, maintaining this blog, I allow myself to think that there is no point as nobody will be reading it.

Among my other goals, these things I'm doing that are going against the goals are extremely stupid, and it took me until today to accept that I should stop moping about and shoot for the stars. I should learn to take better care of my body, allow social relations to continue and not mentally strain myself to do things. I should not get worked up if I do not have many blog views, but accept that it is a work in progress. And school is in 9ish days so my previous inclinations toward Procrastin8Ville have gotta stop now

So rather than disclaiming my original resolutions, I will commence a modified new start. And this time, I will see it through.

So my confirmed and readjusted goals for the big year (which I wanna maintain for a great time) are (in no particular order)

• Keep a good health: that is be comfortable in my own skin, physically fit and optimum, mentally capable and ready and socially connected.
• Study hard but in short regular intervals: without those cram sessions before a test or whatnot.
• Enhance my spirituality and faith: develop an even better relationship with God, and maintaining my morality.
• Maintaining my diary and my blog; hopefully updating this every Sunday or Friday (AUS EST)
• Taking a photo every week, of something meaningful: and treasuring it as I really want to look back in the future or just be able to feel that every living breathing moment in itself is memorable and worthwhile.

So there they are, out in the open, accessible by anyone. And I will fulfill them or my name is not Zahraa Albander.

I realize, as I hastily proofread, that I have been hella cheesy this post, but gawsh cheese is gooood.

^^that was cheeZy

Before I sign off, I wanna show an image that I found quite inspirational. Czech it out below:

>> OH, and another note is that I encourage commentary. I know this surface isn't great, but feedback is generally always accepted.

RETRIEVED FROM: http://s3.amazonaws.com/Infographic/TheSuccessIndicator.jpg

SIGNING OUT, it's your chica,

Z